Boys Loose in the Kitchen -

National Men Make Dinner Day
by  EJ


(Response to Janet’s November Observances)
Nov. 2012


“No, no, no, out of my kitchen.”  Maria stood waving her wooden spoon at the Patron’s sons.

Hearing all the yelling coming from the kitchen Murdoch rushed from the Great Room hoping to stop Maria from doing any permanent damage to his younger son.  He stopped at the doorway, shocked, he saw both his son’s facing Maria’s wrath as she shook her wooden spoon at them. 

“Boys, what is going on here?” Murdoch slowly entered the kitchen and made sure he was out of range of Maria and her spoon.  He raised his hands, “Maria, please lower your weapon.”

When she placed the spoon on the table Murdoch went to her side and placed a comforting arm around her shoulders.   He glared at his sons.

Johnny was standing slightly behind Scott, he was obviously waiting for his brother’s golden tongue to get them out of trouble.

“Well?”  Murdoch repeated.  Maria continued to scowl at the invaders in her domain.

Scott cleared his throat, “Today is National Men Make Dinner Day, so Johnny and I are going to make the evening meal.  Maria will have the afternoon off to relax and enjoy her garden.”  Scott was obviously pleased with his narrative.

Johnny knew this was a bad idea but was glad that Scott was doing the talking and that Murdoch seemed to be buying it.  However the look on Maria’s face indicated that she didn’t.

Scott looked at the still angry cook, “What do you think Maria?”

She shook her head, “No, I will not have the ninos mess up my kitchen, no, no.”

“We will not damage your kitchen and promise to return said kitchen to you in pristine condition.” Scott placed his hand on his heart.

Johnny was liking his brother’s idea less and less by the minute and he wasn’t sure just what was being promised.  Why did he let his brother talk him into this stupid plan?  He also wondered if Murdoch would be mad if he killed Scott over this pristine thing.

Murdoch was trying not to laugh especially since Maria was beside him, even if she was unarmed.  He cleared his throat and looked down at her, “Maria?”

She looked up at the Patron and then to the boys, “What is pristine?” 

“It means we will leave it the same way you give it to us.”  Scott motioned to both of them.

Maria thought for a minute but then nodded, “But it better be like I leave it.”

“It will, we promise.”  Scott’s smile faded when he heard his brother growl.

“All right boys.”  Murdoch quickly escorted Maria to the garden.  He hoped he wouldn’t regret this but he wasn’t sure about Scott’s plan and Johnny didn’t look happy.  Actually, Murdoch thought Johnny looked anything but happy.

“Well little brother, let’s get started.”  Scott rubbed his hands together, “I was thinking Beef Wellington, fresh vegetables, and for dessert some fresh fruit or better yet, a pie.” 

“What’s beef wellington, why can’t we have normal food?”  Yep Johnny was really hating this idea.

Scott huffed, “Johnny we are fixing normal food.”

“Nah, normal food is somethin’ I can recognize.  How about tamales?”

“No, absolutely not, I will not have my stomach lining burned away with your over spiced food.”  Scott said over his shoulder as he headed for the pots and pans hanging over the stove.

Johnny pouted and began his plans for revenge against his really annoying older brother.  Shaking his head he knew for sure, Maria is going to kill us, then I’m gonna kill Scott.

Murdoch left Maria in the garden and decided he would sit on the patio so he could keep an eye and ear on the boys.  He was enjoying listening to Scott lecture Johnny.   Then his younger son started arguing about Scott’s weird food ideas.  Murdoch chucked at the brotherly bantering.

However, after much banging, arguing, and even the slight odor of burnt food Murdoch figured he better check on the boys.  He didn’t want to have to deal with Maria if the boys destroyed her kitchen. 

He peeked in the door, and to say he was shocked was putting it mildly.  His two sons were covered with, well he wasn’t sure exactly what, but they were both a mess.  The kitchen table was littered with dirty bowls, utensils, pots, and pans.  The stove had burnt on food and drips of what looked like gravy, the floor was also covered in numerous spills.  The sink was full of dirty items and the floor under the sink was wet.

Murdoch shook his head and raked his hands through his hair and yelled, “What happened?  You boys have wrecked Maria’s kitchen.”  He was seriously considering letting Maria kill both boys.

Scott and Johnny both jumped at Murdoch’s roar.  They pointed to each other and together said, “It’s his fault.”

“I don’t care whose fault it is, get this place cleaned up and do it now.” 

“What about dinner?”  Scott wasn’t going to give up easily.

“Now and I mean it, if Maria sees this mess…  Well don’t expect me to save you.”  Murdoch turned and stomped off.  He headed for the garden not sure what he was going to do to keep Maria from seeing the disaster in her kitchen. 

All those years he wished, wanted to have his boys home with him.

Murdoch took a deep breath and thought, well, be careful what you wish for.

The End







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